Monday, March 10, 2014

Cheap entertainment

I am starting to believe that I was placed on this earth to serve as cheap entertainment to others.  You know to make you laugh!  God does work in mysterious ways and I think creating me is proof of that for sure!  This was my epiphany this morning.  And what led me to this moment of absolute clarity were the following random thoughts from my scattered notes the past few weeks.

I keep thinking Jeff is an extremely lucky guy.  I mean he is married to me and for the past ten years he has pretty much had a personal chef, a cleaning lady and a great mother for his children.  And I am always laughing (oftentimes at myself).  But amidst this amazing situation, he is so grumpy often... I wonder how he can possibly be grumpy, when he is married to someone like me?! how is this even happening. I dont know. It is quizzical.  Perplexing.  I must investigate this matter further...

Meanwhile, I did meet the 10 year aluminum anniversary gift requirements... twice!  We had ice cream pie in an aluminum tin (Jeff's favorite dessert) and I bought him a new 7 inch Laser ice auger and I am pretty sure the handle is aluminum or if it isn't we are going to pretend it is!  AMAZING.  Yes, I not only gave him fresh seafood that had not been frozen for over a decade (remember I splurged and got us salmon cakes at the butcher shop in Spring Lake. They were AMAZING by the way!), but I also provided two forms of aluminum in order to show my affection to him.  More proof of my "good wife" theory. 

 Icecream Pie-Jeff's Favorite Dessert in an aluminum pie tin!
 Our beautiful girls with the icecream pie!
 We snuck in a visit to the butterflies at Meijer Gardens.
Don't worry I packed sack lunches out of the pantry.
No grocery shopping required for this outing!
 The aluminum handle of the 7" Laser Ice Auger.
How Romantic am I? 
and a long sleeved t-shirt from Fish On in Nunica.
Apparently7 inches is a good size when you are talking Ice Augers!

I had a minor setback at the grocery store. This was before the self-imposed restraining order, but I just found my note about it because I take notes on random paper towels, food wrappers or scraps of paper- you know whatever is handy when I have a brilliant idea- and then I usually lose them for a few days until they resurface when I am trying to organize our house, or sort through the ridiculous volume of papers sent home from school.  That is just how I roll.  It is a highly sophisticated note taking process that I have developed.  It is patent pending by the way so don't go trying to steal it!  Most people wouldn't understand, but other unorganized mothers of three totally get it.  Anyhow the incident involved goldfish crackers and my four-year old.  Enough said on that one you can figure the rest out.  She is snacking on some goldfish right now as a matter of fact!

My mother-in-law went and surprised me at family dinner two weeks ago!  She totally pulled a "Veronica" in that she cooked a pound of pasta and combined two random jars of marinara-like sauces out of her cupboard (one of them had capers and artichokes in it though so not your "traditional" marainara situation going on) and she called it dinner.  My son loved it and actually chose it over the home-made vodka sauce with shrimp on penne that she had prepared.  Brilliant. 

The final note comes from my subbing in family dinner this past Thursday while my mother-in-law was out of town. I cooked a roast (from 2012) wrapped in bacon, mashed potatoes and all the fixings!  It received rave reviews! Check it out!

 Seriously good roast circa 2012!

See what I mean?  God is using me to entertain (and feed) others out of my existing food supply of course!
Vern out

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